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Why Many Young Nigerian Men Prefer ‘Baby Mamas’ Over Committed Relationships

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By Gloria Ikibah

In Nigeria today, there’s a noticeable trend among many young men who shy away from committed relationships. Instead of settling down with one woman in marriage, they choose to have baby mamas. 

 
 
This change in attitude leaves many ladies confused and heartbroken, especially when these men initially show signs of wanting something serious.

Firstly these deceptive men start with ‘The Flirting Game’. Nigerian men are known for their charm, and many young men have perfected the art of wooing or gainingthe love of these ladies, especially as they know exactly what to say and do to make a lady feel special. From sweet words to constant attention, they paint a picture of a serious relationship. However, as time goes on, the promises of commitment and a future together start to fade. The relationship stalls, and instead of moving towards marriage, it either ends abruptly or shifts into a more casual arrangement.

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Secondly, One major reason for this behavior is the ‘Fear of Commitment’. Many young men in Nigeria today are afraid of the responsibilities that come with marriage, keeping a home or even being a “Bread Winner”.The idea of being tied down to one woman for life, dealing with in-laws, and providing for a family can be overwhelming. They prefer the freedom that comes with having a baby mama, they get to enjoy fatherhood without the full weight of marital responsibilities.

 
Another reason is the Financial Pressures that comes with marriage, especially with the current economic situation in Nigeria, and this also plays a significant role.
 
 
Marriage in Nigeria is often seen as an expensive affair, from the traditional rites to the wedding ceremony. Many young men feel they are not financially ready to take on such a burden. On the other hand, having a baby mama seems like a more manageable option. They can provide for the child and the mother without the pressure of a full-blown marriage.

Also having a baby mama is one of the many ‘Influence of Popular Culture’ in Nigeria. Popular culture also glamorizes the idea of having a baby mama. Many celebrities and public figures in Nigeria have baby mamas, and it’s become somewhat of a fashion. Young men see this and think it’s the way to go. They want to enjoy the perks of fatherhood without the strings attached to marriage.

The Lady’s Perspective

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For the ladies, this trend is frustrating. They enter into relationships with the hope of marriage, only to realize that the man they are with has no such intentions. It’s disheartening to invest time, love, and emotions into a relationship that has no future. Some end up becoming baby mamas themselves, often not by choice, but because they believed in the promises made by these men.

The preference for baby mamas over committed relationships among young Nigerian men is a reflection of various societal pressures and changing attitudes towards marriage. While some may see it as a way to avoid the challenges of marriage, it leaves many women feeling used and disappointed. 

 
 
As this trend continues to grow, it’s important for both men and women to have honest conversations about their intentions from the onset of any relationship.
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Port Harcourt refinery: NNPCL disowns recruitment notice

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The Nigerian National Petroleum Company Limited (NNPCL) has disclaimed a purported recruitment announcement for the Port Harcourt Refining Company (PHRC), warning the public against falling victim to fraudulent schemes.

In a statement released on its official X handle (formerly Twitter) on Friday evening, the oil company clarified that no separate recruitment process was ongoing for PHRC beyond the one initiated in 2024.

The statement, titled “NNPC Ltd Disclaims Purported Recruitment Announcement for PHRC,” was signed by the Chief Corporate Communications Officer, Olufemi Soneye.

“The Nigerian National Petroleum Company Limited (NNPC Ltd) has urged members of the public to discountenance purported recruitment announcement for the Port Harcourt Refining Company (PHRC) circulating in certain online platforms,” the statement read.

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NNPC Ltd further explained that its recruitment process, which commenced last year, covered all its subsidiaries, including PHRC. The company noted that candidates who passed the Computer-Based Aptitude Test were proceeding to the interview stage.

“The purported recruitment link being circulated in various online platforms is the handiwork of fraudsters who are keen on taking advantage of the newly revamped Port Harcourt Refinery to fleece unsuspecting members of the public with a phantom recruitment announcement. We, therefore, call on members of the public to be wary of the ploy and not fall for it,” the statement warned.

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Hajj 2023 refund: Pilgrims from Adamawa get N61,080 each

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The Adamawa State Muslims Pilgrims Welfare Commission has disbursed N61,080 to each of the 2023 pilgrims from the state over poor services rendered to them by the service providers while in Saudi Arabia.

The executive secretary of the pilgrims commission, Malam Abubakar Salihu, disbursed the refunded money, saying it was a step of accountability.

The disbursement was paid into the account of the pilgrims or, for those without account numbers, through the local government schedule officers of the 21 local governments of the state.

Responding on behalf of the beneficiaries, Alhaji Shuaibu Musa Mele appreciated the commission for ensuring that each pilgrim gets his rightful refund.

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The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia had earlier refunded money through the National Hajj Commission of Nigeria, for sharing among the 36 states of the country.

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Security operatives destroy Bello Turji’s food storage facility

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A school building in Fakai village, reportedly used as a food storage facility by the notorious bandit leader Bello Turji, has been destroyed.

The facility, which had been stocked with large quantities of food supplies, was completely razed, leaving the structure in ruins.

According to local sources, the school was repurposed by the bandits to support their operations in the region.

It served as a key logistical hub for storing essential supplies, ensuring the group’s ability to sustain its activities over time.

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The destruction of the stockpile is seen as a major setback for Bello Turji’s network. By eliminating a critical resource hub, the operation is expected to disrupt the group’s supply chain and hinder their ability to operate effectively in the area.

Counter-terrorism expert Zagazola Makama reported that the incident underscores ongoing efforts to counter the influence and operations of bandit groups in the region.

Residents of Fakai village and surrounding areas hope this effort signals further strides toward restoring peace and security.

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